I told my Boss that i had to visit my mother in hospital so i could go to London and see some live bands once.
my boss called the hospital and confronted me the next day, Lie! she barked.
Thats because she has been moved i replied, she was in that one and now shes not.
I wasted an entire day traveling up there only to find out she had been moved to another location thank you very much.
Oh she said, sorry.
But let me ask you something, if she had died and the reason she wasn't at the hospital was because she was at the morgue, what then?
You may have done irreparable damage to my already fragile mind.
she never doubted me again.
Incidentally, that was a long time ago, and my mother still lives on, so no harm done.
But the moral of the story is,
1: the bigger the lie, the more likely it is to be believed.
2: you cant bullshit a bullshitter
i later found out that she had in fact not rung the hospital at all, she was trying to trip me up.
besides how would have she known which hospital to ring, as i hadn't actually told her which one she was in _________________
*Phone call, 12.30 on my day off*
"Greg, can you come into work today, to cover someones shift?"
"No"
"Why not?"
"Its my day off, I'm hung over, in my underware, playing Star Wars"
"Oh. Ok, see you tomorrow."
"Manager breaks tooth, has to go to dentist, needs me to cover his shift*
"No Jayson. Tomorrow is my day off, and I'm drinking tonight, becasue I got paid yesterday."
"Well do a half day, and I'll give you another day off."
"No! I'm going out!"
"Fine, go out and come in at 12 tomorrow."
"... You realise I'll be hungover right?"
"I don't care, work upstairs tomorrow, it'll be dead. Sit down all day."
"...Ok"
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