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| Batmanuel |
Sleepy Bavarian Village of WankBritain, a nation renowned the world over for its sophisticated culture and the sobriety and sexual modesty of its citizens, is once again in diplomatic hot water, after a group of British visitors to the sleepy Bavarian village of Wank, were jailed for stealing the unfortunately-named towns signs.
Wank, a small village of just 28 houses (and three missing signs) near Nesselwang, in southern Bavaria, is no stranger to the depredations of British tourists who simply can't keep their adolescent mits off its signs. In the last five years the village's signs have been replaced no less than 27 times. In this latest incident, an entire coach load of puerile sign-fetishists from every corner of the UK, descended upon the village like a plague of locusts sweeping across the plains of Sodom and Gomorrah in what one shocked resident described as a 'plague of locusts sweeping across the plains of Sodom and Gomorrah.' "I hed no choice but to lock zem up for zair own good," the shaken, forty-six-year-old Burgomeister told utterpants over a foaming stein of beer in the village's only hostelry—the equally unfortunately named 'Titz Hof'. Not that we would have known that as the sign above the door was conspicuous by its absence. 
A spokestypeperson at the British consulate told us that the theft of street signs that are considered unusual or amusing by British collectors was 'an increasingly serious international problem' and that 'the criminals involved in this activity will be severely dealt with.' When pressed to reveal what action the British Goverment would take in this case, the spokestypeperson shouted: "I wish someone would name a town 'arsehole' so we can arrest all the fucking wankers in one go!" 
Our researcher soon saw why when she came across webpages whose liberal use of asterisks made complete nonsense of what would otherwise have been perfectly readable advertisements. Best F*cking holiday Tips F*cking hotel accommodation Write your own F*cking Hotels and F*cking Accommodations Review in F*cking! Ask us about the best ways to get into F*cking! 
The fact that the word has no meaning—amusing or otherwise—in the German language, is no consolation to the angry citizens, who are now only too painfully aware what it means in English. Unlike Wank, which has so far been spared the indignity of being made a laughing stock by the entire English-speaking world because the word is not well-known in America, the Austrian rib-tickler is having to spend up to a third of its annual budget replacing stolen signs, despite welding them to six-inch diameter poles and embedding them in concrete. Thefts have got so bad that the residents recently voted on changing the town's name to 'Shagging' until a visiting American who had seen all of Michael Myers films pointed out that this was almost as bad as 'Fucking.' All of the above was from the very funny Utterpants website you have to check it out its very funny http://www.utterpants.co.uk/index.html |
| Batmanuel |
You know what, it suddenly accrued to me,
You dont have one of these in your bedroom do you Rascel? |
| The Rascal King |
And watch your spelling, old man, its Rascal. 
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| Batmanuel |
Hey i copy and pasted most all of the original post, so if there's spellings there not mine i have spell check i do, so even if i do spell sumpting wrong , ITS STILL NOT MY FAULT, Boy.
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